Gary Fahey is a mental strength coach, highly sought-after speaker, bestselling author and founder of Strong Men’d, who embodies the mantra of “Lived it, Learned it, Earned it.” His unique Brutal Honesty brand was forged through 18 years with the Australian Federal Police, where he led the Australian Prime Minister’s Personal Protection Team and managed the Office of Commissioner; a deep, dark, and destructive battle with mental health; and a combination of formal and informal education, coaching and mentoring to develop his own practical systems and structures for success.
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Here we sit down with Gary, to know a bit more about his journey as a personal coach.
Q. What inspired you to become an entrepreneur?
Gary: The first half of my life to date I achieved great success, the type of success many would envy – except I was unfulfilled, felt personally insignificant, and was (silently) battling a major depressive disorder. While I was Externally Bulletproof, I felt Internally Brittle. After hitting my rock bottom I began to work with, learn from and study under experts from around the world in mindset, neuroscience, habit formation, mental health, and peak performance and built a system that turned my life around. Personally feeling the impact that Brutally Honest coaching can have on the alpha personality – whether they are at rock bottom, or on the edge of greatness – I had finally found my purpose.
Q. How did you get started?
Gary: I studied health science at university and had always been a health and fitness coach as a side hustle to my career so when my world fell apart I retreated to what I knew – health and fitness coaching. While I added many formal and informal qualifications to help in my personal battles, I soon found those that came to see me for physical fitness coaching seemed to have similar internal points of failure that I had experienced. I began sharing what I had learned to turn my own life around, find significance and build true success which also turned my clients’ lives around.
Building someone’s fitness is fantastic, changing someone’s life, immeasurable. It became clear what I should be doing with my life.
Q. What was your biggest startup challenge? What steps did you take to overcome it? What did you learn?
Gary: The biggest challenge I faced during start-up was dealing with imposter syndrome. Everyone I had learned from, been mentored by, or studied were ‘experts’. They had changed thousands of lives and were hugely successful. I looked up to these people and now entering that field I felt as though I didn’t belong.
I was fortunate that my mentors were encouraging with their stories of times they got started and also made me feel comfortable and confident that my life and lived experience was not only a perfect training ground for the career I was about to embark on, but that combined with the formal and informal education I had received, lived experience added a relatable quality that many coaches do not possess.
They also helped me understand that my role was to start by becoming the ‘coach’ I needed 5 years earlier, not to emulate more famous people in the field.
Together with continuing to document and craft my own systems for success, being open and honest with clients, and learning to be comfortable feeling uncomfortable I was able to both excel in my coaching field and now also coach others looking to create their own business success.
Q. What is the Most Memorable Thing You’ve Done Since you Started your Business?
Gary: There are two things that stand out as most memorable achievements since I started my business. While nothing will top the clients who express their gratitude for not only changing their lives, but for some, saving their lives, their relationships, their careers, and their significance, being recognized by the Australian and New Zealand Mental Health Association as an Ambassador and publishing a best-selling book are two personal achievements I would never have considered possible at my lowest ebb. To be asked to share my experience with the Australian and New Zealand Addiction Conference and International Mental Health Conference have also been wonderful recognition of the success I have forged.
Q. What is one book you recommend, and why?
Gary: Marcus Aurelius – Meditations
It’s a book that changed the way I viewed life. I not only read it (a couple of times) but it also led to me delving deeper into stoic philosophy, learning more about personal responsibility, understanding the importance of focusing on what is in your control, and what living a ‘good life’ truly means.
A close second would be Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search For Meaning. If this doesn’t teach you that in ANY situation you have the power to CHOOSE your thoughts and own your own mind, then nothing will.
Q. What are your top 3 favourite online apps, tools, or resources and what do you love about them?
Gary: I work a lot more hands-on and old school and don’t really use apps in my business
Q. In terms of legacy, what is the mark you’d like to leave on the world?
Gary: I want to change the way men manage mental health by providing relatable, relevant, and real systems and strategies for successful and strong men struggling.
Q. In one sentence, what’s the best advice you’d give to someone just starting out on their entrepreneurial journey?
Gary: Find people who will stretch you, support you and be honest with you but also remove people (at least from your entrepreneurial journey) who do not make you better, or push you closer to the success you are looking to achieve.
Find mentors who have been there and done it, have lived experience, and are willing to share it honestly with you.
To keep up to date with Gary and his journey, connect with him on his Facebook and Instagram.